We all want things. And we are never satisfied. The more we aquire and/or accomplish the more we desire it seems. I came to this thought this morning because I allowed myself to become so upset about not being able to afford the half-marathon...I have a child to feed, a home and car to maintain. That takes top priority. And racing can be expensive! The race fee, the gas to get there, the shoes (oh how I adore new shoes...if I could afford any).
How in the world do you people race so much (and in cute outfits) and afford it all?! And be so kind to let me in on the secret. ;) much thanks.
BUT, the meaning of this post is contentment. I began running and racing because I fell in love with the whole process. It's fun, gives me confidence and it's like a mini reward everytime I cross a finish line from all my hard work and dedication. (Well except for one race...) I should be content that I had the racing experience a few times. But why is that not good enough?
1.) I haven't gotten an official Half or Full marathon finishers medal yet
2.) I've only placed one time in my age group (being a small local race...but hey, I will take it!)
3.) I've only bought 2 pairs of running shoes
4.) I have yet to enjoy a larger scale event
5.) I like to race and meet new people
6.) I'm young and have a lot of life in me ready to GO
7.) I like the free food after (except since I paid a fee I guess it isn't really free...)
8.) The sense of hard work and reward is an amazing feeling
9.) It keeps me focused
10.) It's better than chasing bad boys <~~~ for REAL
And I'm sure there's more to my list I just can't think of currently...
Wanting more is like chasing the wind. You chase and chase but never catch...meaningless (Ecclesiastes 6:9).
However, I don't think wanting is always so bad. God knows the desires of our hearts. He created us for passionate lives. And I'm passionate about my child, life and running! So where there's a will there's a way. Even if it's not my way RIGHT NOW, I know that He will provide in due time. If we wait patiently (ugh. Seriously, I know, I am NOT a fan of that phrase either.) The timing will be perfect.
So I need to breathe, chill out for a second (minute, hour, day, week...), and know that He is God. What I need is always provided.
You know, I do really struggle with it though. I REALLY wanted to race that half in Asheville so bad. I might have to start making my own races...ha!
My mom sent me this picture via text (thanks mom!) the other day and you know, it has meaning here...be proud that I get up and run today. Can't afford a race? That doesn't stop me from running. I need to learn contentment and to be proud of the fact that I get up and GO no matter what. Be proud of where I am TODAY! I'm not who I was yesterday. Only better (and a little faster).
**Please tell me there's another "poor" runner out there that has struggled with this as well? And how do you deal? Are you content to only race a number of times? How many races do you get in a year?**